miércoles, septiembre 14, 2005
Just watching...
I´ve been wondering...
What if this is who I am? What if this everything I´m meant to be? Just an observer.
I guess it´s because that´s the role I´ve been playing in my life so far. I chose this role.
The observer, the one who stands in a corner, who analyzes everything and everyone but never gets into action. Still, motionless.
It´s not the most "amusing" role, that is for sure, but it´s the safest one, at least, that´s how I see it.
And sadly, that´s what I´ve been all about, safety.
I fear my own heart but I trust my brain, as unbelievable as that may sound.
My brain, oh Gosh!
I know what many of you may be thinking... She trusts HER brain?
Well, yeah, it´s the only one I have, what else can I do?
But lately, I´ve been hearing this Whisper in my ear (no, I´m not a schizo! At least, not yet!).
W: What if, instead of being just an observer, you just surrender?
Me: Surrender? What do you mean?
W: You´ve always followed your brain, your common sense...you´ve always been so rational. How about a change? A twist to the plot of your life? Surrender to your heart!! Listen to your heart!! At least once in your fucking life!!
I´ve been hearing the same annoying advice for quite some time now:
SURRENDER TO YOUR HEART!
The thing is, I still don´t trust my heart, it´s feeble. It can be so easily broken.
I think I´m going to keep things as they are, for now.
Who knows?
Someday, may be...may be not.
